Self Healing Process

I'm due for a HSG on coming Wednesday and is in jitters these few days. This test is to see whether my tubes are blocked (hopefully not) or not and determine the next course of treatment. Should I clear this test too then I can move on to the medicine stage to help stimulate ovulation. Crossing my fingers and toes now.

It is during these time that I'm particularly down and depressed. More prone to crying especially when seeing emotional stuff. Well, blame it on my haywire hormones.

Some days in the morning, I just feel like going back into the covers and sleep the day away but somehow I managed every time to drag my sorry ass out of bed to get ready for work.

Work does keep me very busy especially at this time of the month where the crew taxes are due. If I dun turn up, who is going to do the calculations and verifications? The only one who can help is the least helpful person in the whole office.

I especially missed Lynne the most at this period since she is not there to talk to me, hear me out, console me and even let me manja a bit. It's a difficult period for me.

There is of course the ever energetic Barney who have the ability to talk nonsense non stop anywhere, anytime. Another big ability is to piss me off like at least 10times a day during conversations. As much as I hate to admit it, I actually welcome the distraction while talking to him since my mind will need to think fast on the replies to win the arguments which I usually lose. But I do enjoy the gossip sessions la. Lol. So, here's a Thank you to you Barney, for keeping me distracted so that I would not dwell on the procedure.

Anyways I found a new hobby recently to keep myself busy at night -colouring. Hehe

Brought a rainbow sunflower picture off Taobao which has numberings on it. Just have to follow the number and colour. Sounds easy? It is not.

After 3 days of colouring

Need a lot of concentration since some of the numbering and spaces are pretty small. The paint is not easy to use either, didn't turn out to be what I imagined. Will have a lot of touching up to do.

 

But it does help to keep me busy and makes me tired at the end of the hourly colouring each night. It also trains my patience which is essential in the waiting game of a blessing.

A week later

My self healing process is in progress. At least I think I am still coping well. Didn't have much emotional outburst this time hehe.

Do keep me in your prayers ya? Let this be a smooth journey from now on to let me experience motherhood.

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