To Lucas

To my small boy whom I lost my temper at last night:

Mummy is really sorry for getting angry and scolding at you in the middle of night at 1.30am while you screamed your lungs out and refuse to be calm down cuz Papa is slow in feeding you your last night feed.

But mummy also know how fast you will forget about it given that you start smiling at me after you calm down and even holding my hand while you were drifting off to Lalaland after you finally drink the milk.

This is why I still insist to let you sleep beside me instead of your Kor Kor cause I know I make you feel safe by even letting you hold a finger while you drift to sleep when you stirred.

Mummy is just too exhausted last night. Having gone thru 3 nights of crankiness from you and Kor Kor. The only thing mummy wished is to have a better sleep last night so that I can deal with allotment today.

I know sometimes you both only wants mummy to feed but papa is also trying his best with you both you know?

As mummy typed this post now, I'm dealing with a massive headache and a long day at work.

Mummy only hopes that you will know that despite losing my temper at you last night, mummy still loves you alot and is sorry for being harsh with you and mummy is not complaining about having to do night duties but certainly hopes you can make it easier by cooperating a bit while drinking your milk.

Be good my Lucas and always be the cheeky boy that mummy loves. For it's your cheekiness that keeps mummy entertained whenever the day gets bad.

Love,
Your sorry mummy