The worst it can get

I noe you had been encouraging, edging me on thru these difficult times. Giving me the support and advices and the best of all, a good listening ear.

I've been thankful for all these, but seriously after 1 week, I felt like I am in a war zone for 1 yr..It is physically and mentally straining...Despite the support I seen from you people, it is still me who is facing the shits, the pressure that is put on my shoulders are suppressing..

The onli thing I dun understand is, wat went wrong...I dun like the feeling of "死了都不知道为什么。” At the very least, let me noe why the verdict rite? 

The onli consolation is that I have the angels who are supportive and told me repeatedly is these plp who are creating troubles, not me and I shouldnt realli take heart to all these..Many a times, when boss asked me on the current situation, I veri much wanted to feed bak to him honestly, but somehow I swallow the words back..

If 1 day, I should decide that enuff is enuff, I maybe would not hold back and tell him..but for now, I think my bigger concern will be my health..Damn,the blue blacks are back again..this time on my knees..1 side 1...By 10th Aug, the results will be out again, hopefully all is good..

For now, I juz need to relax myself and not stress out as not to worsen my condition...You will neber noe wat is it like to be in my position while you wait for the monthly blood test results..Its like waiting for a sentence to be pass on to you and when you escape a death sentence every time, you count your lucky stars..

I am counting my lucky stars now and hope to count them again come this 10th Aug..As for the assholes who are seeking to make my life any miserable than it is now, I will stand stronger against you..For I think, life cannot be shitter any it is now for me..And it might juz get shitter for you in future...