Perspective

You know when people say marriage isn't about you marrying the person you love, it's marrying into their whole extended family, culture, flaws and many more which comes as a "whole package"? I wasn't sure what was it about till I got married.

Actually I wasn't even convinced I should accept the whole package. Afterall, it is even difficult to adapt to coping with one person's (your spouse) different culture. What's more with the whole family. And so I learn and tried my best to fit in. Like my blog title suggest, marriage is the beginning of a long long learning journey, there seems to be a new thing to learn now and then.

For example this morning, we received a call from Mr Love's side asking whether did we gave the wrong ang bao without mentioning which ang bao it is. Immediately, Mr Love got scared and woke me up and asked. I tried my best to recall whether did I mixed up while giving out the ang baos. But I am pretty sure I didn't since I segregate the ang baos amount according to different ang baos designs.

He called and checked and was told that the person in question is puzzled why the ang bao value is substantially smaller this year. I was like "Huh? This kind of things you can ask de ar?" My mummy had taught me to accept what is given to me no matter the amount. Here we are, having someone questioning us upfront no less about the decrease in the amount.

Wah Seh. I AM IMPRESSED.

My cute hubby still turned and asked me on the amount which I replied and not forgetting to remind him that it was HIM who told me to prepare this amount when I checked with him during the preparations. So there, it is the correct amount as least to my understanding.

Of course he had his reasons in doing so. The recipient had stepped into the workforce last year and thus we agreed that can cut on the ang bao. Furthermore, I don't think we are obliged to give BIG amount every year.

Have it occured to you that Mr Love & I did not received any bonus for this new year and all the ang bao money, CNY goodies and including whatever we need for our household came entirely from our own savings?

I was actually pretty outrage by the questioning especially at 9am on 3rd day of CNY. Whatever happen to the teachings we have? Even when Mr Love was trying to console me that they were merely "just asking". I can see even he was not convinced and was upset on the whole issue. Thank you for just making our day bad.

I was never a believer of not giving too much so that people would not expect much more in future. I believe in giving within our means. If I can afford more this year yes, I would give more. But if it is not a good year for me, then I would have to work within my means.

In this case, it all seems to me that we cannot drop the value and only can increase which is of totally no senses to me. Seriously, even if you are just curious about it, you should have keep within yourselevs and gossip behind our back. I wouldn't mind since I wouldn't know too.

But to question us at 9am is outright RUDE. Even it is just asking or curious or whatever god damn reasons you have. Even I have given the wrong ang bao, do you expect me to exchange? What if I have accidentally give to the wrong person?

This is definitely one of the most exasperating time I had after 6years of marriage. It makes me look at things differently from now on and you cannot blame me for it.