I saw an article shared Facebook saying that you should fall for someone who doesn't love you. It's states about how one can realized you can self heal when your love is unrequited and that you can go look for love again and will not be afraid of failure since you tried it before.
How true this article is.
Many had known that Mr Love and I being each other 1st boyfriend and girlfriend and got married after 7 years of dating. Its was rare in our generation in Singapore but not unheard of.
But not many knew that prior to us dating, both had our share of unrequited love. Whether it is us to others or others to us.
Like what the article had mentioned, I once carried a touch for someone during secondary school years for the longest time I remembered. When he got together with another girl, I was devastated. The agony, obsession of the unrequited love consumed me.
My mind is full of his images, every smile, every action, every thing about him. The most unbearable time is right before bedtime. Many days, I fell asleep thinking of him.
Worst is, we were good friends. He would confided in me about his relationship problems or talk long hours on the phone about everything under the sun. He even cried in front of me when he broke up with his 1st girlfriend. How not to be melted? All the while, we remained as good friends till his girlfriend got very jealous and we drifted away.
You know what people say about the greatest pain is loving someone right beside you but without his/her knowledge? It totally applied to me then though I am not sure whether it is love as I was very young back then. But I am pretty sure I am attracted to him.
I was angry at myself for not having the courage to express my feelings to him. I never get to know what will happen if I let him knew. I don't know whether it is due to the taboo of girls making the 1st move or it is my mum's threat of not allowing a boyfriend before I graduate from secondary school scares me more. In any case, I kept it buried deep in my heart.
I read somewhere that if you wake up 1 day and suddenly though of this person, it means you had put down him/her already. It is pretty true, at least for me. It took me quite long to realise that I had let go of this unrequited love. 1 fine day when I woke up and got ready for work after my O levels. I knew I had self healed already. But what I didn't know that this is going to makes me braver when it comes to love.
Then Mr Love came along, not out of no where though but we got closer over the years we know each other. I can sense his interest in me but also know his character of not knowing how to express his feelings.
To say we have no feelings for each other would be a lie. We are waiting for a chance or for each other to see who makes the move to make it more obvious. After much thinking, I decided to make a move. It is actually due to my failure the 1st time that makes me realised that I should have the courage to pursue what it may be the love of my life.
Truth to be told, I was as not attracted to him as compared to my senior. Perhaps this time, I am more cautious with my feelings. Still, I like him enough to let him know my feelings. This proves to be a correct move for if I wait for him to make the 1st move, we maybe need to wait till dunno which donkey year for him to muster his courage.
Having the experience of unrequited love, we know how important it is to treasure our partner. This is perhaps the reason why we managed to walk this far though not without obstacles.
So those who still do not have the courage to take the 1st step, go on and love someone who might not return your love, get hurt and healed. Then perhaps you will find the courage to pursue love actively the next time.
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